Feeling guilty can be miserable! It can impact sleep, mood, relationships, productivity and more. Finding a way to overcome guilt is also so important for overall happiness.
So, what is guilt? Guilt is a feeling of being bothered by an action one regrets. It seems that guilt can range from mild to extreme, and the degree to which someone feels guilty is multifaceted. It is based on the situation, past experiences, who is involved, the reaction of others, one’s own sense of self, and so forth. Feelings of guilt can impact one’s happiness as well as relationships with others.
Interestingly, there are some upsides to guilt. For example, guilt can motivate us to do good, to have empathy, and to work hard. The problem is, sometimes guilt can spiral out of control and lead to quite negative thoughts. Feelings of guilt can lead some people to feel like they are bad or unlovable. So while guilt can be motivating, research shows that it’s not the...
Exercise can help reduce symptoms of mild to moderate anxiety and depression. Reap the mental health benefits of exercise!
Here are 10 tips to help get you started with exercise - if you're already exercising regularly, these tips can help keep you motivated!
I realize that ability levels, time constraints, and interests regarding exercise vary, so I've tried to include something for everyone. Of this list, pick your top 3-5 favorite to help you get your exercise to an optimal level:
Exercise first thing in the morning. There are a few reasons why this works best- you have the most energy in the morning and if, you wait until the afternoon or evening, you might not get around to it. Something else will come up that distracts you from the plan of exercise. Sometimes gyms are less crowded before the workday than after. Exercising in the morning is actually something I started doing recently and it makes a huge difference! You also start your day with an...
Research shows that mild to moderate depression can be treated with exercise, and the benefits are often equal to taking antidepressant medications. Sure, taking a pill may seem quicker and easier, but exercise not only alleviates the symptoms of depression, it also gives you many other health benefits (both mental AND physical), and none of the side-effects that can come with medication. (Note: If you are taking antidepressant medication- or any medication prescribed by your doctor- please talk to your doctor before making changes).
There are several reasons why exercise helps with depression, including the release of endorphins in the brain, and the promotion of neural growth. Seems like some great reasons to hit the gym to me!
Exercise is also an amazing treatment for anxiety. Have you ever noticed that a couple of hours after vigorous exercise, you feel more relaxed but also alert? In other words, exercise calms the nerves without making you tired. Just as...
Many people get their morning boost from a cup or two of coffee. I’m one of those people, so I get it! But what can you do in the afternoon to get a boost, that won't interrupt your ability to sleep later?
Let me start by saying that coffee, and other caffeinated beverages, are often responsible for keeping us awake at night. Sometimes clients will report to me that they have trouble falling asleep, and when we discuss caffeine, they’ll say something like this: “That’s not the problem, I don’t drink coffee after 3 PM.”
For a lot of people, though, 3 PM is too late to have your last sip of coffee. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but it’s important for you to know that coffee after 12 or 1 PM, may keep you up at night. This is because it can take 8 hours (give or take) for caffeine to leave your system, so not consuming caffeine in the afternoon is super important to getting a good night’s sleep. Remember,...
What I'm about to explain is simply amazing, motivating, and essential for every person to know!
First, ever had that feeling when you are anxious and you get butterflies in your stomach? This is a great example of the very direct connection between the mind and body.
So here's the coolest thing... The mind has been proven to heal the body. This is because the body is always responding to the way the mind is thinking and feeling. In fact, the immune cells that fight disease are triggered by multiple neurotransmitters in the brain. So your brain can send your cells messages to help you heal!
The implications of this are fascinating to me. Could this mean that focusing your mind on healing a certain area of your body could actually increase the immune response to that area and help it heal? This would certainly make sense! And some research supports this too. In fact, this helps explain why some people experience improvements from placebo...
First, let me explain the stress response. When we feel a sense of threat, a stress response is activated. The problem is, if we are continuously under stress (or continuously perceiving many things as stressful/threatening), we start experiencing a stress response more easily, and often inaccurately. If you know anyone who is highly irritable or quick to become tense, they may be experiencing high levels of perceived stress, and therefore their stress response is easily triggered.
This is where mindfulness comes in. If you practice mindfulness on a regular basis (5-20 minutes a day), your baseline level of stress is lower, and the inaccurate stress response becomes more difficult to trigger. This is a good thing! Don’t worry, when a real threat presents itself, you’ll still respond appropriately. (BTW, specific information about what mindfulness is, and how to achieve it, was addressed in my last email. If you deleted...
“What exactly is mindfulness?”
This is a question a client asked me earlier this week. As I explained it, it occurred to me that MINDFULNESS, is critically important, popular, but not well understood. So of course I was excited to teach you all about it too!
In short, mindfulness is attention and awareness of the present moment.
To expand, it is thankfulness, peacefulness, and observing thoughts without judgement.
Mindfulness is not the same as meditation, though meditation is one way to achieve mindfulness. Mindfulness is the result of being present and in the moment. An example is sitting and being aware of your senses in the here and now. That is, taking a few minutes to sit quietly and only pay attention to what you see, hear, smell, taste, and feel (touch).
Medical research has found that achieving mindfulness for a few minutes a day (usually 5-20) can improve mood, happiness, longevity, memory and concentration, work...
The way you think affects the way you feel, and vice versa. This is why it's critical to have a positive inner dialog. That is, the thoughts you're saying to yourself in your own mind, the ones that no one else will hear, need to generally be positive, optimistic, and come from a place of love. If your thoughts are already positive, keep it up! If not, read on...
The first step towards having a positive inner dialogue is to recognize the negative thoughts as negative. This might sound easy, but some people have had so many negative thoughts for so long that they don't even notice how negative the thoughts are.
Once you create awareness around the negative thoughts, work on challenging them by being a friend to yourself! I like this particular method of changing negative inner dialogue because it's, quite simply, so obvious. Ask yourself, what would you tell a friend who has the same negative thought you're having? It's obvious...
I recently read a book called "The 1% Rule," by Tommy Baker, recommended by a friend who's a business owner, entrepreneur, and a person who is generally trying to make the world a better place. He knows, like I do, that making the world a better place starts with taking care of ones own mental and physical health. The book is mostly about business, and it applies to all types of personal achievements! The premise is that you can't achieve any goal overnight, rather it's about doing a little bit everyday. The 1% Rule is to improve 1% everyday!
if you know anything about the game of golf, you know that it's very rare to make a hole-in-one. In fact, even the best golfers don't approach the tee planning on a hole-in-one. Rather, the golfer's plan is to get a little closer to the hole, and put the golf ball in a better position to get closer on the next shot and so forth. If you do get a hole-in-one, GREAT! You beat the odds by a long shot (see what I did there!? ) But...
This might be the most important thing you read all day. I’m not kidding :) Scientific research has found that there is something each person can do in their daily lives that will improve happiness, mental health, relationships, physical health, optimism, and decrease stress/anxiety/depression (R. Emmons, Ph.D., 2007). Sounds like the answer is going to be some complicated, time intensive, and expensive treatment, but it’s not. It can take as little as 5 minutes a day!
The answer is… cultivating gratefulness! Yes, CULTIVATING GRATEFULNESS, by focusing on what you're grateful for a little bit every day, can have all of those benefits and more.
There are several ways to cultivate gratefulness in your life. Here is my favorite:
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